Crisis? What crisis?

I’ve just been shopping at my local Tesco. There’s no eggs, bread, milk, flower, pasta, pasta sauce, tinned tomatoes, tomato puree, tomato sauce, cooking oil, toilet rolls, hand sanitiser, kitchen towels, beans, rice, tinned fish, soup, potatoes (fresh or instant), onions, porridge, honey or peanut butter. The fresh meat, frozen meat, frozen vegetables and cereals are almost gone. Even my favourite wine is sold out.

Meanwhile, down the High Street, McDonalds, Starbucks, Greggs and various cafes and pubs are open and packed full of customers. All of them completely ignoring yesterday’s advice to avoid crowds.

It’s about time a certain fat philanderer got off his lazy backside and got this thing under control. He always wanted to be PM. Now’s his chance to act like one.