Boris the Lying Clown and his evil sidekick Darth Cummings
Boris: BHAHaHaaaaa, we won Darth, we won.
Darth: intake of breath …fffff…sssss…
Boris: And now, now, now, now… we, we, we can show then all, yes indeed, show them all that I, that my government, is a One Nation Conservative government.
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Boris: That is to say, one nation UNDER ME. Veni, vedi, veci.
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Boris: But, but, but, but there are still, still some people, yes some people who do not love cuddly, dishevelled, lovable Boris.
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Boris: The be, be, be, be, BBC for a start, with their disrespectful questions about policy and finances, and of course… Channel 4. What do you think of them Darth?
Darth: …fffff…sssss… I find their lack of faith… disturbing… fffff…sssss…
Boris: Well said, well said indeed Darth. We will cut off their funding, remove their charter. I’ll teach them to make fun of One Nation under me.
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Boris: Release Bad Boris!
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Boris: Oh, darned, there’s one of those awkward reporters, wanting to ask questions about single market access, or some woman stuck in Iran. Quick, to the walk in fridge Darth!
Darth: …fffff…sssss…
Platitude of the Day 